Everyone has to start sonewhere

I think 99.95% of parenting is a thankless job. Case in point,  I have a friend, we'll call her Susie. Susie is a dear friend but her children keep her jumping to the extent that I hardly ever see of hear from her. It usually takes her a day to answer a text, by which time I have forgotten what I originally texted her. I think Susie must get exactly 2 minutes a day to herself, and it takes place in the bathroom right before she passes out for the night.
I shared this hypothesis with Susie, and got a prompt response....because she was in the bathroom and there was no toilet paper!
She's doomed,  here's why:
If she already did have TP, there would be a line of children outside the door, yelling encouraging things like,"Hurry up! I have to goooooo bad!"
The fact that there are 3 other bathrooms in the house is totally irrelevant.
Because she is essentially trapped in the bathroom, time will come to a halt. Her children will suddenly become responsible and do things like homework without being told, mow the lawn, or go to bed early.
They most certainly will not answer he pleas for help and bring her some TP, because that violates Murphys law. I'm pretty sure Mr Murphy had a whole herd of kids so he understood how it goes.
If by chance a child does come looking for you it's to extort money. Normally you can shoot down frivolous requests for cashola confidently and move on, but now your little deviant realizes you are complete at his or her 's mercy.
So as I finish writing this blog post, I ask myself an age old, important question not sure when I will get an answer:
Will Susie ever make it out alive?